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Do Y’all Wanna Talk About Reviews?

Attention!  Sam Sykes does not disagree with the nature of bloggers!  Nor does he consider bloggers a waste of time or their opinions invalid!  Sam Sykes is a friend to all bloggers and has an excellent repartee with every one of them he’s met so far!  If Sam Sykes could physically make love to all the bloggers he knew, he would!  He has even threatened them with such before!  Such is the depth of his love!

That particular horrifying message (it sure wasn’t the first and I doubt it’ll be the last, even in this post) is made just because I’m sure there may be some who would accuse me of being overly defensive, stepping on bloggers’ toes or just being a sensitive prick.  I refute this both through the disclaimer above and the fact that I’m not even going to be talking about my books in this post.

We are, however, talking a book.  A book, and the people who read it.  The people who read it and the blogs they write.  The blogs they write and the women who love them.  The women who love them and the emus they raise.

That got a bit ridiculous, apologies.

We are, in fact, talking about The Left Hand of God.  Wait, what?  No, no, the other one.  No, not the right hand.  The left hand!  Paul Hoffman’s The Left Hand of God.  This is one of the “big” debuts of 2010, apparently, having received a lot of attention, apparently.  I’ll take peoples’ collective word for this, as I haven’t heard anything.  Nor have I heard anything about my own book besides what people tell me, but that’s really more of a personal fault.  At any rate, the book seems to be very much either a “love it” or “hate it” kind of book.

The Speculative Scotsman does not love it.

I advise you take a moment to read that, as there’s some genuinely cool discussion that goes on there.  Go ahead.  I’ll wait.  Maybe I’ll go to the bathroom while you finish.

Done?  Good.  Now read this follow-up.  I’m not linking you these articles because I was mentioned in one them and contributed to both, but rather because I feel we could use a discussion about the whole dang thing.  I’m going to clarify a few points here: one, I like Mr. Alexander, the Speculative Scot himself.  Two, I have never read The Left Hand of God.  And three: I think, if you have an inkling to, you should read it.

Now, I can see you other speculative Scots hoisting your haggis in preparation for hurling, but I must ask you to stay your intestinal projectiles for a moment while I clarify a few more things.

You will notice that I never said Mr. Alexander was wrong to say what he did.  You will also notice that Mr. Alexander did not recant in the slightest.  I would never ask him to do that and, if he had any integrity (and he has lots), he would never recant because I asked him to.  He’s perfectly justified in telling us exactly what he feels about the book.  What’s more, he’s doing his job: to give us his opinion and tell us why he thinks that way.  This is what we expect from our blogs and they give us exactly that.

But that’s what we ask from them.  And that’s all we give them.  The only thing we can take from Mr. Alexander’s review is that he didn’t like the book.

I mention this because I see a lot of people occasionally looking at a blog and taking gray areas and putting them in black and white.  They look at a review and say: “Oh, this book is bad, but this book is great.”  This simply isn’t the case.  As I said in the follow-up post, all we know is that the book didn’t work for Mr. Alexander.  It might work for Mr. Peabody or Mr. Malone or Mrs. Hoffwoman, but not for this fellow.  This is great.  This is perfect.  This is a guideline and, as I said, if our tastes are similar to Mr. Alexander’s, then chances are good that we’ll also share a similar point of view on the book.

Or will we?

The greatest thing about books is not only do they work for different people, they work on different levels, entirely.  You can give the same book to ten different people and, while they may share similar views on certain aspects of the book, chances are they’ll also find something entirely different that no one else saw.  This is what makes books special: they are interactive.  You don’t just read them.  They speak to you.  You find things in them that some people miss.  Your favorite books are probably just so because they do the same thing to you.

For example, look at Patrick Rothfuss’ book: The Name of the Wind. An excellent book, by all rights, but there’s a sharp divide between opinions of the main character, Kvothe.  On the surface, he seems to be an arrogant blowhard, and the book is just a bunch of pages of a guy talking about how great he is.  But that’s the surface.  Beneath that, we’re left with a wonder of his true personality: what’s he covering up?  What’s he lying about?  What’s his story?  Is he the snobby punk we see him as?  Or is he something more?  If you’re looking to me for answers, I really have no idea.  Other people have a good idea, though, and theirs are all equally special and that’s what makes the book such a success and why people continue to love it.

This is my main point: if you feel a pull toward a book, read it.  If someone else tells you it’s bad, still read it.  If someone else who shares a lot of your opinions and tastes still says it’s bad, still read it.  Because chances are that whatever caused you to be drawn to that book in the first place you will find again in its pages and discover something you didn’t think you would.

Now to clarify two other points: this does not mean you should buy every book you see and this does not mean that bloggers are at all pointless.

To discuss the first part: you definitely should research a book before you buy it.  But perhaps you’d do well to listen to your instincts more than you might?  Study the review and see what appeals to you.  If you feel a pull just from the description of the book, it might be well worth it to check it out.  In the reviews of Tome of the Undergates (I’m just bringing it up as an example!  This does not count as a plug!), some people see the amount of gore, violence and intercharacter bickering and blanch (these people are wicked who you can see in every day life by the fact that they’re eating children and kicking puppies…maybe), while others jump up and down and get really giddy and curl up into a little ball of ecstasy at the mention of a long fight scene.

To discuss the latter: bloggers definitely do play a role in this proposed method of thought.  And that role is the same they’ve been playing for ages: giving us their opinion.  In this, they serve a few roles.  For one, they actually tell us what the book is about and we can judge if it’s something we like.  For two, they can expose us to the inverse of that “pull.”  If you feel a sudden revulsion to a book, then it might be worth passing on it.  Likewise, if you find a certain blogger has never steered you wrong in the past, they probably won’t steer you wrong this time.

But, let’s be totally honest: books aren’t too expensive.  Between eBooks, paperbacks, used bookstores and sites that cater to them, you can probably find all the books you want.  Hell, let’s be really honest: if you’re a serious reader (and I have no doubts that you are) and you’re starving, a shiny new book and a loaf of bread, to you, is a very difficult decision.

Just remember: there’s a wealth of books out there and you owe it to yourself to listen to you, first and foremost, when buying them.  You never quite know what you’re going to find: something your favorite reviewer missed, something you never thought you might discover in any book and, nine times out of ten if you go to a public library, hobo poop.

Do Y’all Wanna Talk About Reviews? Read More »

Slow News Day

It’s true, I did have great plans for my first news post of the new website.

It was originally going to be a tale of daring-do and daring-don’t, the staunchly provocative and highly erotic story in which Alex Bell and I quadruplehandedly took down a smuggling ring led by Joe Abercrombie using only a coffee can, a high caliber taser and our guts.

It was going to be pretty good.  You might have crapped your pants.  As I happen to think you look quite good in those, though, I decided against it.

Still, points need to be made in regards to our fancy new site.

First of all: the contact form.  For reasons unknown, it sends all people trying to contact me to the Spam Filter, perhaps suggesting, in that pretentious, wordless way it often does, that you are all beneath my notice?  I assure you, nothing could be further from the truth.  I am so committed to maintaining contact with you, my gentle readers, that I have frequently put off several engagements, including my own arranged marriage, to stay in touch.

As a result, I lost the dowry and no longer have a shiny new bicycle.  But you’re worth it, readers.

At any rate, if you’ve yet to receive a response from me, please send it again and demand a free hug and I will probably give it to you.

Second Points Bulletin: The facebook link is broken, yes.  I promise you I’ll get it back up when I get my facebook page working.

Third Item of Interest: Y’all heard of Eastercon?  It’s apparently big news in Britain, bigger even than the Beatles, who were supposedly bigger than Jesus, who trounced Zoroastrianism in the polls.  By that logic, then, Eastercon is bigger than a major religion, a messiah and a rock band.

This is big.

And I am going to it.  I will be there most days, maybe doing a panel or something similar?  And also hanging out with the boys from Sci-Fi London, probably doing an interview with them…maybe going to a strip club…a strip club with girls. It’ll be pretty intense, guys, and I seriously hope you’ll see me there so I can complete my Herculean labors and challenges that have been issued to me by the British public.

Standing Challenges:

So, yeah, only a few good announcements and…what’s that?  You want more?

Oh, very well.  Here, have the fruits of today’s labor:

Can you identify them all?!

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Darksiders

There’s no shortage of authors out there who will eagerly claim that games (usually role-playing games) influenced them and their work greatly. Frequently, if you’re too old to remember what to do with wooden nickels (don’t take them!), it’s Dungeons and Dragons that you cut your teeth on. But video games account for a lot these days, too.

With greatly unabashed sincerity, I say that video games influence my work more than is probably wise to admit to for a man hoping to be taken seriously. One, in particular, really had a lot to do with my adoration of secondary worlds, heroic adventures and putting pointy things into other fleshy things.

The Legend of Zelda.

For those of you who don’t know, Zelda is pretty much the same game over and over: mute, pointy-eared hero embarks on quest to gather a variety of tools to defeat glowering, coal-skinned villain and save talkative, pointy-eared princess. This is done through a variety of interesting dungeons, giant monsters and occasionally, an entirely different universe.

This was the first game I played for my Super Nintendo back when I was 11 and I went absolutely nuts for it. I loved everything from the dungeon-delving to the puzzles to the very, very understated relationship between Link and Zelda (it’s very hard to convey romance with a guy who does not utter a single word). Ever since then, I’ve wasted countless hours of my life on Zelda games: Ocarina of Time, Majora’s Mask, Wind Waker and especially Twilight Princess.

Thus, when I heard of a post-Biblical apocalypse Zelda-themed dungeon adventure game by the name of “Darksiders,” I was pretty ecstatic. I checked it out pretty thoroughly: giant monsters, gathered weapons, puzzles, dungeons and exploration of a vast and alien world.

By all rights, I should have liked this game.

As it is…it’s alright.

Let’s start with the gameplay: pretty good, actually. You get a variety of weapons to kill your enemies and get some nice God of War-style finishers to finish off wounded enemies (though there isn’t actually a point to most of them, since killing them by a finisher or just beating them up gives you the same amount of “souls” or currency). You fight through dungeons, solve puzzles and explore an Earth that was ruined when the Apocalypse began prematurely, leaving all humanity zombie food for various demons.

And therein is the problem: there is no humanity to this game.

The story, on the surface, is kind of cool: you are War, a Horseman of the Apocalypse and servant of the Charred Council, a legislative body of omnipotent beings created to govern the war between Heaven and Hell. You were called to Earth before the Apocalypse was supposed to begin and found the war reignited. A century later, mankind is toast, angels and demons use Earth as a battlefield and you’re sent to make things right.

…how? By killing a Destroyer, apparently. This is where my problems fire up.

War is a giant, muscle-bound, long-haired, violent, killing machine. His enemies are various amalgamations of fire, spikes and claws. His allies are supernatural beings that are chiefly concerned with his duty. His duty is to restore the Balance between Heaven and Hell.

And I really don’t give a shit.

Because there’s nothing really at stake here for me. There are no humans left, so War has nothing to really save. The Earth is already destroyed, so he can’t really restore dick. War feels no fear, no pain, no sadness, so I can’t really relate to him. The Destroyer is cloaked in shadow and there’s no doubt that he’s the enemy, so everything I’m doing is just to get closer to him and…that’s it?

This game had almost everything I wanted in a Zelda game. It had tools, giant monsters, lots of fun exploration and a bunch of crazy crap happening. But it lacked one thing: vigor.

Zelda games are, without a doubt, brimming with character. The environments are unique and interesting, the characters are wild and entertaining, the boss battles are epic and Link is instantly relatable, since he’s a tiny dude fighting a big, BIG challenge (for what reason, though? Because Zelda told him to so he could prop up her monarchy? I may have to write a manifesto on this later, but that’s beside the point).

Darksiders has character, but it’s just…eh. The environments are desolate and largely interchangeable (dust here, fire there, spikes here). The characters are entertaining, but not really likeable (demon merchants, demon princes and Mark Hammill). The boss battles are epic (but why wouldn’t they be?) And War is not at all relateable because it’s very, very hard to feel sympathy for a Horseman of the Goddamn Apocalypse.

They both have character. But while Zelda is the bright, cheery kid who occasionally has fits of rage where he goes around hitting chickens with a stick, Darksiders is the gloomy kid who smells like french fries and never talks to you unless he wants to show you his collection of trout skulls.

In short: fun, but not “go nuts” fun. Try it if you’re hard up for Zelda or you just really like whacking zombies with parking meters.

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